The Love Child of Jason Mraz and David Lynch

Idol songs America has chosen is the theme this week -- I wonder if the sky was the limit or did they have to choose from a list?

Keith t-shirt update: is this from the show Heroes? Ryan makes a bizarre comment about somebody's cologne. (On the first break, he jumps into Harry's arms like that monkey boy character from SNL about 15 years ago.)

They show a clip about Jason Mraz-- I've heard wanna-be Idols sing his song a million times, but couldn't have told you what he looked like until now. He's the Mentor tonite.  Dr. L said he has the most pleasant voice, she wants him to read a book to her LOL.

First up, Alex in the KOD spot. Mraz has some good advice about opening Alex up. Let's see if he takes it. Doing Sweater Weather. I like this, I think he's modern and catchy enough with this to stay, but this is the top of the show and he could be forgotten. They give him the back-handed compliments so maybe they think (or hope) he's gone?

Caleb: oh, dear God, he's doing the lamest Aerosmith song of all time. I guess it's a "hit" but literally any other song by them is more genuine Rock. I'm sure he'll do fine. Then again... the start of this is awful. He's off-key all through it. Sure, he powers up in the end, but damn. This was a major mistake in my book. Let's see if they call him on it: nope, JLo turns it into a positive somehow. Dr. L said she wonders if they cut Jessica the same break. Harry is talking about looking in the camera? WTF? What about the singing? Keith is talking about "feeling", what bullshit.

Alex, Jena and Sam perform together -- nice harmonies here. Keith loved it! Never heard a group number get that kind of crowd reaction, impressive.

Jessica is doing Human by Christina Perri? Never heard it. Mraz gives her a crash course in performing LOL. This song has a weak opening, but a nice chorus - her voice is strong and clear in those parts. I don't care for the song but I tough she made the best of it, WAY better than Caleb. Best of the night so far in some ways, but Alex was more pleasant. True to my prediction, they can't really praise her, but they have to "school" her on what she did wrong. She still seems happy -- maybe they beat her up less this week, so it's a victory.

Sam: they dressed him like a nitrous oxide salesman at a Phish concert, what the hell. His dog (and Ryan's) are so cute. Who the F is Arianna Grande? She's wearing one of Harry's sweaters as a dress. Jason wants him to get lost in the song, that shit will never happen. Doing "Sing"  -- nope, he did not get Funky with it. Still, it was a decent vocal. Keith craps over his lack of falsetto, but JLo likes his "looser" performance. Harry blames him for "de-funking" he band, LOL. I think it's clear now they want a Caleb-Jena Finale.

Godzirra is coming! Can't wait.

Jena - My Body, another song I've never heard. At least Idol is losing some of the old dusty standards they used to perpetrate on us every year. The song begins and it's a warbly bag of marbles in her mouth. Then the chorus kicks in and it's just kind of sharp and shreieky to me. The next verse is better, but this is is all over the place for me. Her performance is at least more lively than the others. The TCO gets the light effects, don't they? And Jlo just creams all over it. Yep, they just praise her to the moon. And -- wouldn't you know it? The "random" song America chose is one she wanted to do anyway? What a coincidence.

Caleb and Jessica do the Stones. Wow, they sound good together. Caleb almost knocks her out with a wild swing LOL. She looks uncomfortable singing about making love to Caleb, it's so funny. Ryan picks up on it and tries to milk the discomfort for a cheap laugh, typical. Imagine Ryan making love to you -- yeah, that's creepy as hell, isn't it?

Alex is backstage getting made up. His hair is dangerously close to Eraserhead levels. He gets a video request to sing Say Something. He has a really radio-friendly voice. Do these slow, Emo songs help or hinder a contestant? It would be interesting to see a study. I think his voice sounds pretty, but it is kind of putting me to sleep. The crowd loves it, Keith jumps to his feet, so they appreciate the vocal. Harry actually says kind things! They have to eliminate him, Sam and Jessica in the next few weeks, so who knows who will go first.

Jena: doing Valerie. Maybe taking on too big a voice in this song, though she didn't choose it. One thing that works for her is she believes she belongs here onstage, so that paves over a lot of her sometimes less-than-stellar vocals. I thought it was a little too old for her.
Incredibly, Jlo keeps it real. The crowd is so primed to hear praise they nearly revolt. When harry asks what name she wants to be known by, she confirms she's a little Diva by saying she wants to be known by just her first name. Hah!

Sam, doing a Fray song. They open on it with very little fanfare, maybe for good reason: this is another pleasantly forgettable performance. Jlo reads off her script, because she probably forgot what she was supposed to think.  So does Keith. They (Idol) don't want to sink him but don't save him either.

Jessica: got some kind of glam stage setup here. Thank Gd for once she doesn't have her guitar! This is a Lana Del Rey song. She looks nice, great tattoo! and this was great for her range. Harry actually liked it -- and I agree with Keith that there was a David Lynch vibe to it. Jlo had to take a dump on it at the end -- got to protect Idol's TCO.

Caleb: holy shit -- Whitesnake?!! THIS is what Caleb is built to sing. He could go on tour tomorrow with a rock band. Effortless.  To us, he's the one to beat, but who knows what America thinks.

So the Bottom 2 should be Sam for sure, and maybe Alex. Now, they said Jessica was in the B2 last week, so maybe she doesn't have the voter base. So I guess I will say the B2 is Jessica and Sam, and if there is justice, Sam goes home. If the tween girls really are googly-eyed about him, Jessica goes home.

Dr L & K out!