<i><b>THIS</b> is AMERICAN IDOL!</i>


Thursday, March 10, 2016

A sporadically good night, with some definite highs and a lot of "whatevs"

Idol Top 8 — Duets!!!

Dr. L said Jlo looks like she’s wearing a slip! She probably needs Idol to help hype her cop show (which my buddy Adi created, but still looks like a shaky bet).

The Top 8 roll out. Is LaPorscha’s hair 2x as big as at the start? I read a great article on MJ’s Big Blog about how Scott Borchetta is pimping Tristan:

First up, Trent and LaPorcha. I read that the others were afraid to team with her. Doing See You Again. Personally I like the tone of his voice better than hers. She has the power but it’s sometimes boring. They sound good together. Good song for both of them. They both are sweet and classy.

Next up, Avalon and Sonika. We missed the name of the song, is it Rise Up? Move Mountains? The judges look like someone farted onstage. Not a great song but pretty good harmony. Jlo claims nobody has weakness in their voice — we’ll see when Lee Jean is up. Dr. L said that one was just meh for her.

Scott Borchetta comes on wearing Nic Cage’s snakeskin jacket from Wild at Heart.

They announce MacKenzie and Dalton are doing a lame-ass Backstreet Boys song. I hope to God it doesn’t sabotage Dalton. Maybe this is making panties wet across America but it does nothing for me. It’s like Buddy Holly and Green Day forced to do a song for Community Service. The judges hate it.

Tristan and Lee. Notice Scott threw Lee under the bus for being sick, in case they suck. Doing Aerosmith’s worst song in history. He brings zero believability to the lyrics. Tristan blows him off stage immediately. Who picked these songs? Did Steven Tyler get it in his contract to pimp this song? It already made all the money. She goes off the rails a little at the end. Lots of boos on the critique.

So now we get to the solos — and another bottom 3 sing-off? LaPorsche is up first, with a tear-jerking moment with an old teacher (we get to see her with non-stratosphere hair). OMG, why do they bust out this Beatles song every season? Her outfit made me have an acid flashback to 1973 Patti Labelle on Soul Train. They’ll probably love it, but I can’t wait for it to end. She is a good performer. Keith gets in a shout-out to the late great George Martin, RIP.

MacKenzie makes it into the safe zone. Who knew he was a sports freak? He’s doing the classic Joe Cocker You Are So Beautiful — written by the incredible Billy Preston. (Billy is the one on the left here)

He has one of the best male voices left. This is not bad, kind of like the Lite-Rock version of it. That was probably a good song choice, as Harry said. He should be safe — but is he taking votes away from Dalton?

We are tortured by a montage of other Idols doing the Aerosmith song. Thanks! I’m totally doing a screen-cap of Ryan doing sad-emoji!

Nick Fradiani comes on to remind us who he is. We enjoyed him on last year’s tour way more than we expected to. I still hate that he does the “c’mon!” thing when he sings, but he is a pretty decent singer. He won’t drop out of sight as fast as a Lee DeWyze, but he is far from a Daughtry or even a David Cook. It’s like a special Idol Limbo for being famous and forgotten all at once. Dr L said she liked this song.

So we’re back. Up next is Trent! So glad he made it. He’s a country boy who wants to be a horse? He tells a funny story about how he bamboozled his family about being on Idol. Doing Stand By Me. He has that 60s soul-singer vibe going for him, so this is a pretty good choice. He seems to have gotten more comfortable every show. We thought it was great. Harry was making a strange face! But Jlo calls him a bad-ass.

We get a montage of Ain’t No Sunshine (by the incomparable Bill Withers) as done by many Idols. I wonder how many of us old-timers have watched all the Idol seasons?

So who else is safe? Scott’s girl Tristan makes it. She tells a heartwarming story about her Paw-paw. They seem like a sweet family. She’s doing a Martina McBride country tune, but the key is too low for her — what do you bet she’s building to some bug note at the end (but sacrifices 1/2 of the song to do it)? She does have a great voice, but needs some control — they need to stop going for the bomb notes, and stay in the lane. Keith makes a funny Birdman joke. They treat her with kid gloves — she’s probably safe.

So we have the tension of the bottom 4: who makes it out of the B3? Oh, thnk God it was Dalton. He’s a Texas kid, and his mom was a punk rocker LOL. He’s doing a rocked-up version of Eleanor Rigby, sounds a little like Muse. This was more like the Dalton of old. The arrangement was in danger of overpowering him, but he held on. Keith compared him to a waffle iron, which I never considered but it fits. He got great feedback, it should keep him safe for another run.

So this leaves Sonika, Avalon and Lee Jean. The Vegas line was on Lee Jean and Avalon hitting the bricks, let’s see.

Avalon as a kid was pretty much the tomboy she is today. We learn she has OCD — I had noticed the tic thing but I thought it was nerves. Great parents, supportive. Dr L thinks she has the most interesting voice, and I think of all the Idols she sounds like what’s on the radio. She could be the next Ke$ha, right? But she’s better than that. I think maybe her relaxed style makes it seem like she isn’t as into as the others, so maybe voters lost interest? Harry says it, she has no sense of urgency. She has grown on me, but I don’t know if she’s better than Sonika. Does all this judge advice mean they’ll save her?

After 1 million commercials, we hear about how Lee Jean had to move when he was a kid. Music saved him! He’s a good kid, just WAY too young to be here. Doing Let it Be? This is just bad. The song is too old, the meaning too esoteric for him to grasp, and his voice is just too reedy. How can he not hear how off-ket he is — he’s got that earpiece, right? I like his vampire-hunter twill coat though. The judges start off with the “you’re gone” (but not in so many words) speeches. He probably is.

Last up, Sonika and her boobs — who knew? She’s throwing them out there a little too late?

So her family was musical in a very Indian way — stuff like the harmonium. She’s doing Whitney, oh Lord. Did she already pcik the best song for Elimination, you think? Or is this taking too big a bite…She definitely is hitting the big stuff, after slightly rougher beginning. She looks good up there, and I would say of these three she knocked it out of the park. Harry loved it. So did Keith. Jlo sort of dismissed her, provoking a bit of a bitch face from Sonika. Does Jlo remember her from the cold-blooded stuff back in Hollywood? I always think they make up their mind before the show even starts.

So we kill time while they go through the motions. They kick Lee and Avalon to the curb, so the Vegas odds were dead on. Sonika gets to sing one more week! I don’t think we were surprised at all. Lee Jean is a good kid, but now the balance has been restored to some degree.

What did you guys think? One of the things we were excited about was, we get to see ADAM LAMBERT live at Idol next week! We’ll tell you guys all about it.

Dr. L and K OUT!