<i><b>THIS</b> is AMERICAN IDOL!</i>


Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Randy the Fish Singer Slayer

Songs of the Last Two Years: I'm afraid this is going to be Songs I've Never Heard Of, because I don't listen to a lot of the crap on terrestrial radio. On satellite I get to live in the past, when music was awesome :)

Guest Mentor: Akon: A guy I know mostly for singing "woo-hoo" in back of Gwen Stefani -- and apparently Idol does, too.

Skylar: Southern Idols always have a cousin with some sports bar, don't they? She's singing a Pickler song, and it really is a great performance. Kiss of Death spot, but she's probably fine. She's going to be a big star, it's so clear, Idol or not.

my hometown of Murfeesboro! They didn't show enough of it for me to recognize it, which was saying a lot, because it ain't that big. Doing an unknown song. The kid really can sing, and this performance was much better than the past couple weeks. Not all "wow" but had that bridge.

Duet: Elise and PP, they are so cute. Dr. L said they should only sing duets, LOL, because then she can stand them.

Jessica: I missed much of hometown as I was typing this, but it was some San Diego pimping. She definitely is working the Pinoy vote. Her song: I thought it was a too-busy arrangement, and she was trying the vocal gymnastic BS that often derails Idols. Did she almost bust her ass on the piano? They obviously love her, and I decoded their comments to mean they thought she was better than tonight. She'll probably skate by on past triumphs, but 3rd best of the night so far for me.

Joshua: he's 20? Seems older. Cute shout-out from Fantasia!!! Wow, 3 of the last 4 Idols were from the South, LOL. Nice, a catchy tune. I like it. (Wait, does he have a go-go dancer? Wild!) Dr. L said he sure picked a good song. I liked it a lot better than the over-wrought ballads. The band could have dropped back some though. Probably won't go home -- judging by the crowd.

Oh Randy, your new catch-phrase sucks. Dick-head Ryan pisses off Skylar by hinting at S/C romance again. She seems like a GCB if you know what I mean, and his hair probably freaks her out.

Duet: Sklyar and Colton. We heard this song live when it was new, last year. Colton's no Jason Aldean and Skylar's definitely no Kelly Clarkson. My God, Randy actually keeps it real! It was not great.

Hollie: from Texas but sounds like Eliza Doolittle. This is probably costing her. Pink's Perfect. We thought she did a beautiful job! WTF?!!! the "you look beautiful" comment? Holy crap. They are throwing her under the bus big time. The only thing I can think is that she is competition for TCO, whoever it is. I truly don't know how they can read this script with a straight face.

PP: ANNDD -- another Southern Boy. Love the Sanford & Son theme. Jimmy and Akon take him to school. Maroon Five. I like this song -- he's not doing his DMB thing as much. Hmmm -- a little more bus-throwing? Looks like Idol is gunning for a Skylar/Colton or maybe a Jessica/Colton finale? We haven't seen Elise so maybe SHE'S the one they're pimping. She is in the pimp spot…

Trio: Josh & Hollie are so cute. This is not good -- the three sound like shit together. Hollie, Josh not bad on solos. Jessica not so much. Was she in the wrong key for most of the song? Josh was definitely the standout.

Elise: Awww -- what a sweet shout-out from Jason Seigel. Seems cool. She's from Charleston? Saw another Idol dive bar watch party. I am glad that Jimmy told her not to wing it as much. Hmmm...This was pretty good, but I wasn't jumping up and down. I cracked up at her new move, I call it the "card-catalog", like she's reaching out and plucking them LOL. Usually she just does the Poopy Dance and the "orchestra conductor" with her hand. WOWWW -- they are pimping the PHUQUE out of her! I guess they know how to market her, Dr. L said. Not that I don't like her, but it's kind of shameless how they manipulate things. Her overworked "jazz" thing gets old.

SO -- is another guy going out? probably not. Since Idol "judging" has so much sway, I'll say Hollie is doomed.

Dr. L & K bottom 3: Jessica, Phillip, Elise.

America's bottom 3: Hollie, Phillip, Johua

-- Dr. L & K

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