<i><b>THIS</b> is AMERICAN IDOL!</i>


Wednesday, May 4, 2011

In It To Win It, The Way We Spin It

Idol top five, one current, one classic...

Hannibal Lecter in the audience?

And Kelly Preston, who Charlie Sheen says "shot herself" in his house in the 90s.

Randy with the grasp of the obvious... "You got to TRY to win, yo"
Dr. L said Sheryl Crow used to diss Idol, she must have come around this season.

James: One Step Closer by 30 Seconds to Mars,
KOD spot -- but he isn't going anywhere, is he?
Maybe I'm crazy but I'm not hearing the "greatness" in this song. Is he on key? Was the mix right?--on our TV it sounded like the music was way lower than James.
Judges shamelessly pimping, though. Steven wasn't clapping at first, if you pause just after the explosions went off....

JLo is wearing Granny clothes!

Jacob: Jordin Sparks/Chris Brown (does anyone REALLY like them? I am not a fan of either of them, so I'm biased).
Yep, his version sucks just as much as Jorbacca's. Dr. L said it was "awkward", and uncomfortable to watch as well as hear.
Hmmm -- Randy throwing Jacob under the bus. Obviously #2 tonight is the REAL KOD spot.

JLo has been so funny this season, talking over Randy's dissenting opinions.

Lauren: Flat on the Floor by Carrie Underwear. Lauren says she can't walk and chew gum at the same time. Iovine and Crow tell her to forget performing and just sing, LOL. She'll just stand and stomp her foot.
Good choice of song, best of night so far. Sounded like an actual performance! She does have control problems, however, she was out of breath in some runs and missed some big notes. I wonder if the Spanx is killing her lung capacity like it did Carly Smithson?
Judges pimping the $hit out of it. Looks like they want a Lauren/James finale.
Dr. L said, "Man, she's an old-looking 15."

Scotty the Potty: "Gone", Montgomery Gentry. Jeez, sounds like one of those fateful songs you sing the night you're voted off... but he won't be.
Howdy Doody is running and jumping around, ha. Dr. L says "he's trying to give it all he's got." I just see his ridiculous face and think I'm being Punk'd. He did all right with the song but he has almost no upper register.
Second best so far, got to give him that.
Judges give him tongue-bath. Dance with the Devil? My Devil has bigger balls than that. JLo LIKES him growling? Somewhere, Casey just puked a little in his mouth.

Haley: Unreleased Lady Gaga song "You and I": Translated as, no one will know it.
A "moment"? We liked the song, but she performs it EXACTLY like she's done every other song, squinting, smiling, waving her left arm, growling. She did all right, but this could have been Top 13 night, forgettable. Dr. L wonders why she didn't sing part of it a cappella?
Judges throw her under the bus like Jacob. Love how they let Iovine encourage her to pick the song then rake her over the coals once it's too late.

Another ten-minute commercial break, and...

James 2nd: "Without you", Harry Nilsson. Dr L says, "everybody sings this song!" James has been consistently one of the most emotional contestants. A very heartfelt performance! The polar opposite of the marionette shit we get from Scotty.
We love how seriously he takes this, it really does seem like his competition at this point. Not the best vocal here but it's true, gives 110% every time.

Jacob 2nd: Nazareth "Love Hurts". The idea doesn't sound as crazy when he starts. Pretty good -- and then he brings it on to Jesus and it goes off the rails. If he could have kept it like the 1st part, genius. But he can't help himself.
Steven calls him on it, then JLo points out a screwup -- the de-pimpage continues. He looked good in his suits tonight, Dr. L says.

Lauren 1-1/2: "Unchained Melody" by The Righteous Bros. In Simon's day, possibly the most oversung song on Idol. She says it's her parent's song; they seem more like "Achy Breaky Heart" people to me. Good idea to pick the recognizeable song though -- unlike some other blondes on this show. They said she had to interpret it her way: obviously, she has no freaking idea what this song is about. Sounds totally swallowed up by the song. Nerves? Dress looks like she's signing on a Greek cruise ship in 1967.
I almost fell asleep in the middle. She "checked out," Dr. L said. But will they pimp it?--
ooh, JLo gives her true feelings away: "nothing to judge there", followed by some scripted comments from Nigel. You got it right the first time. But they want her to stay in. She consistently gives about 65%.

Scotty 2nd: "Always on My Mind", by the KING. Iovine says what we're all thinking: Scotty can't out-sing anyone that's left, he just has to out-Scotty them. Dr. L liked it, thought it was "really beautiful". I wasn't jumping up & down, but was nice to hear somebody come out and just sing a song, and not try to blow anyone's head off.
Jlo busts out the "artist" card. Randy carries it. Then Scotty's cute Granny comes on! Idol, you just cranked Florida up to 11 voting for this kid.

Haley 2nd: "House of the Rising Sun" by the Animals. Cool choice! Wow, wish she had done the whole thing a cappella. Got a little growly, but overall pretty dang good. This really was the right mix of blues, rock, "sweet n sour n raspy" soul for her. She really does have a nice voice.
Is Randy's jacket like a big domino? Now they're praising the crap out of her. If this were the Simon days, I would say they are damning her with faint praise, so her base voters feel complacent.

Will they go for a Bottom 2 or Bottom 3?

our B2: Jacob, Lauren

America's B3: Jacob, Haley, Lauren
B2: Jacob & Haley, either way, Jacob goes home.

-- K

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